ReBlog: No end-zone to the friend-zone
This post (Commentary: No end-zone to the friend-zone) is a powerful article that touches on a subject I feel particularly strongly about: the epidemic in male culture that the end goal of socializing with women is sex.
This is a particularly hot subject in Los Angeles because it is a literal fact that, most likely due in large part to the movie, tv, modeling and porn industries, there are many women who have a serious inflated sense of self worth/importance and act truly cold hearted. On the other hand, there are just as many, or more, men who are the same.
And this culture feeds off of itself until we get people of every age in this city thinking that the only way to enjoy the awesomeness of sex is to act fake, exaggerate or make up a bunch of shit to make yourself seem too good for the person you’re talking to (but in covert, fake-modesty language) and play with a persons head.
Well I say fuck that bullshit. When a women is nice to me, I am nice back, and expect nothing for it. Conversely, when I am nice to a woman (or anyone) and I get negativity or that look that so clearly says “here’s another asshole that just wants to get in my pants”, I don’t get bitter or mad. I empathize, smile and go on my way.
I most definitely wasn’t always this strong, It is a hell of a lot easier to go with the flow and copy what everyone else is doing. It took a lot of self de-programming which was only possible by actually educating myself, reading books, blogs etc. to the point where I realized these truths for myself and was strong enough to make a personal difference.
And when I get laid, both she and I know who we are and what’s going on (and it’s awesome).
It talks about how dangerous the concept of the “friend-zone” is. I happen to agree. Women don’t owe men shit. You shouldn’t go out searching to get laid every Friday night. Instead you should seek to be at a bare minimum, just a decent human being, no matter how others treat you.
Oh, and growing up and finding goals that serve a greater purpose than a temporary boost of endorphin’s in your blood stream would be a great place to start.
Here’s the article. Enjoy it and give it some real thought. Bravo to the student(s) who wrote it.